I absolutely believe, like you, that kink-shaming and victim-blaming should stop. Whatever the victim’s personal life was, she didn’t deserve to die.

But I have to point out it’s not kink-shaming to say “breath play” or choking, like auto-erotic asphyxiation, is extremely dangerous. (and I’m not even sure that’s what was going on in this case anyway). If you *must* play like that, you’ve got to have someone a) who you absolutely trust and b) who knows how to keep it as safe as possible. Even then, you’re risking permanent brain damage.

I just wish there was a way to publicize the very real danger without coming across as kink-shaming.

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