OK, well I guess if you’ve been sent to the hospital — or you know someone who’s been sent to the morgue — because of an abusive partner, I would definitely agree that it’s not safe, and you have every right to be skittish. All the women I know who have been beaten to the point of lifelong disability are pretty skittish about dating too.

I agree that we should hold every domestic abuser accountable, regardless of gender. I agree that we should take every victim’s allegations seriously, regardless of gender.

But don’t try to both sides this. Women are overwhelmingly the victims of DV, and suffer a LOT more physical trauma — up to and including death — at the hands of male partners or exes.